I fiddled with them for quite some time. But something was wrong with the key hole. The keys just don’t seem to get along with it tonight.
I dragged my feet to the bathroom, exhausted after the days work. The leftover pizza from last night was my only dinner. Leftover, the word stayed with me for more than a minute.
I grabbed the remote & flipped through channels on the tv. Gulping down coke devoid of gas made my taste buds loathe the liquid I forced myself to consume. Isn’t that what we do to ourselves as years go by? We are deliberately stuck in a life we never chose.
A movie airing on tv brought back memories. “Watch it” she said, “If you want to”, with glistening eyes that were telling me to watch her favorite movie, not asking.
With nostalgia written all over my face I was reminded of the halcyon days.
The phone buzzed on the table while I stared at it listlessly. I saw her name appear as it buzzed endlessly. Every little thing weighed me down tonight, drops of water in the kitchen sink clashing against the cold hard metallic basin, lights on the mute tv screen but most of all it was the buzzing phone.
She must have stopped calling after myriad of calls like she always did, I told myself as I woke up at half past 12. I switched off the tv & checked my phone. There was only one missed call at 9, when I might have fallen asleep. I felt stupid for believing that she cares.
No one does. I stared at the shapely shadows dancing on the ceiling as I lay on the couch. My whole life flashed in front of me, all chapters at once. Then my mind jumped to the future. I see myself excelling at the job I love. The picture of a perfect family with two kids living in the suburbs warms my heart. But perfect is just a word. What if the future is happening right now?
We collect pieces of souls & give some as we break apart. Our time, soul & heart is never truly ours. All we have is this life.
This life, I said aloud as the ceiling turned red. The shadows seemed to welcome me in their realm. You belong with us, their voices echoed in my head. They hovered around like a black veil where no light can shine through.
You belong with us, my fingers caressed the cold, hard metal I could free myself with. My salvation.
I can hear it buzz now, do it. It’s too late, do it
“Hey, call me when you get this. Look, I know we’ve our differences but let’s talk it out”, she left a message after the beep.
Sunshine poured in through the window lighting up the room like never before. The morning had devoured all shadows with the dawn of a new day. But the shapely shadows will rise again every night, as hope fades into the darkness. As long as there’s light, you’re safe. But it doesn’t last forever.
The mint green couch was painted with a dark red hue. It looked extravagant in the sun light. He lay with a hole in his head which was very small compared to the black hole he had been harbouring inside his soul all this time.
The drops of water in the kitchen had seized, the tv didn’t light up anymore, and she finally left a message for him. Nothing weighed him down anymore.